Top 5: Vice Presidents

Both Obama and McCain are said to be searching for their respective Vice Presidents this weekend. So we compiled our Top 5 list for both nominees. Here are Old Man McCain’s:

5. Bobby Jindal – He’s the new Governor of Louisiana and definitely much younger than McCain (but who isn’t?). He’s reportedly been invited to McCain’s barbecue this weekend, but he’s a baby to politics. On the plus side, he’s 36 years old and Indian (the red dot variety).

4. Condoleezza Rice – She’s definitely got foreign policy experience. But it’s not the good kind. Donald Trump famously noted, “I see Condoleezza Rice, she goes on a plane, she gets off a plane, she waves, she goes there to meet some dictator, they talk, she leaves, she waves, the plane takes off…nothing happens.” She’s got the double minority thing going, but if the racists wanted a black person in office, they might as well go with Obama.

3. Mike Huckabee – People like this guy for the most part. He’ll definitely get the Evangelical vote on lock, but they’d get destroyed on the East Coast.

2. Mitt Romney – He’s really not doing anything these days and I’m sure still has money to trick off trying to get in the White House. People kind of know the guy and respect how he bowed out of the race early (even though he lied about why). Problem is he’s Mormon and nobody knows what that is. And he completely switched his political views lately and they would be labeled as the all-flip-flopper ticket.

1. Charlie Crist – The Florida Governor who pushed for the Democratic primary to be moved up and started the ensuing controversy. Every Republican owes him some dap for that move. He’s pretty popular in Florida so that would be a lock for them. But he’s got a full head of white hair and it’s gonna look like old vs. young. But I guess it’s going to look like that regardless.

And here’s Obama’s list:

5. John Edwards – Respected guy in the party after running for President twice. Young guy who’s always looking out for the little guy. The guy can’t carry North Carolina though, which is a problem.

4. Bill Richardson – Great on foreign policy, has cabinet experience, locks up the Hispanic vote. Only problem is he’s overweight and 2 minorities on a ticket isn’t a great idea just yet.

3. Joe Biden – My early favorite for the VP position. He’s got foreign policy experience coming out of his ears and he’s an old white guy, which people seem to be comfortable with. Good choice, just not the best choice.

2. Jim Webb – War hero, father of war hero, middle aged white guy. I don’t see anything wrong with him so far. He just spoke out on bridging the race gap from the other side which is tremendously helpful to everybody. The guy wore his son’s combat boots while running for Senate, so I doubt any flag pin issues would ever come up.

1. Michael Bloomberg – If he’d take the offer, he’d be the best option. Popular semi-conservative Mayor of NYC and a billionaire. Never hurts to have a billionaire ridin shotgun. Probably the best guy to have next to you when gas hits 5 bucks.

That’s right, no Hillary. When he said she’s on the short list, he was just being nice. Sorry.

Wii Fit Review

I’d like to start off by saying that I’m glad I’m alive in 2008. The internet, GPS, wireless everything, and now Wii Fit. Nintendo’s Wii revolutionized video game play when it was released in September 2006 and introduced the wireless remote allowing players to swing the controller at the screen and have it actually respond. Which was great because video game controllers were beginning to get way too many buttons. For the first time video game consoles were being sold to people other than teenagers and loners. Senior bowling leagues even started up because of it…seriously.

But back to Wii Fit. First of all, it was supposed to come out yesterday and Nintendo pushed the date back because all of the stores didn’t get their shipments in. So we had to go to Toys R Us twice, but we’ll blame that on FedEx.

So you start the game up and it asks your age and height. Then it calculates your Body Mass Index (BMI) and lets you know your weight range. For those of you who have Mii’s already, you might notice a slight change in your figure. Your Wii Fitness Age is then calculated and marked on your chart. Along the way they give you a lot of good pointers and stress the need for good balance and posture. You can then choose a trainer  and begin to play the exercise games. The games are divided into 4 categories: Yoga, Aerobics, Balance Games, and Strength Training.

The trainers on the game do a very good job of explaining the exercises so you don’t feel completely lost the first time you step on the Balance Board.  As you get used to the games you will notice that not only are you are having fun and enjoying yourself, but you are also getting your heart rate up and possibly even breaking a sweat (the running challenge and the strength training exercises are no joke…don’t play yaself!)  The thing we really like about the Wii Fit is that you can get a different workout everyday and the more you workout the more games you unlock.

This system is amazing! After certain exercises it tells you about your exercise abilities and somehow it seems to know if you were not breathing properly, were too stiff, or if you plain ole just aren’t as strong as you should be.  This ish is crazy.  If you are ready to get fit and aren’t afraid to get your feelings hurt the first few days or weeks (It doesn’t have a problem telling you you’re obese), then definitely go snatch one.

Jim Webb Speaks Profoundly On Race

Vice President Sen. Jim Webb, in an interview this morning on Morning Joe, spoke out about Obama’s lack of support among Appalacian whites. He noted that they feel a sense of injustice about affirmative action, but that Obama will be able to get their minds right in time:

“This isn’t Selma, 1965. This is a result of how affirmative action, which was basically a justifiable concept when it applied to African Americans, expanded to every single ethnic group in America that was not white, and these were the people who had not received benefits and were not getting anything out of it. And they’re basically saying let’s pay attention to what has happened to this cultural group in terms of opportunities.”

Word, I feel him. Affirmative action wasn’t meant to be a free for all for any minority to gain an advantage over whites. Its original intent was to reverse the discriminative practices of Jim Crow by giving blacks a leg up on higher education. And it was never meant to be a permanent practice no matter who it covered.

Webb went on to draw comparisons between the two excluded groups:

“Black America and Scots-Irish America are like tortured siblings. They both have long history and they both missed the boat when it came to the larger benefits that a lot of other people were able to receive. There’s a saying in the Appalachian mountains that they say to one another, and it’s, ‘if you’re poor and white, you’re out of sight.’ If this cultural group could get at the same table as Black America you could rechange populist American politics. Because they have so much in common in terms of what they need out of government.”

Sen. Webb famously won his Virginia Senate seat over George Allen following the Macaca incident. Now, I seriously doubt if West Virginian whites will be holding hands with Mississippi blacks singing camp songs, but I do think they can agree to disagree on McCain if presented with the right argument. And Sen. Webb is just the person to draw this comparison. I see VP in his future.

Why Is Gas So High? And What Can Make It Go Down?

Oil executives were again called to Capitol Hill to testify about the ever-increasing price of gasoline. And again they came and left justifying their record profits and how helpless they are to do anything about the price. The Senate Judiciary Committee hearing follows President Bush’s trip to the Middle East to negotiate with the Saudis about the same problem. Today oil hit a record $132 a barrel and the average price for a gallon is now $3.81.

So why is it so high? Part of the reason is that India and China have been growing at an alarming rate this decade which increases demand and is always a good reason to increase the price. And they’ll tell you that it’s also due to security concerns in the Middle East.

This would be true if Iraq or Iran was the biggest producer of oil, but Saudi Arabia is. And contrary to popular belief, the Saudi Arabian peninsula is quite peaceful right now. Qatar and United Arab Emirates are 2 of the wealthiest countries in the world per capita and they are building mega resorts and artificial islands all over the place. Russia is 2nd and the US is 3rd. But of course we don’t actually use the oil we produce, we just keep it in reserves. Iran actually produces about half of the oil that we do.

And yes, China and India are growing, but we still consume 3 times the oil that China does and they hav 4 times the population that we do. But we can all admit we’re addicted to oil. But that’s no reason for the price to be high. Is it OPEC’s fault? Of the 13 countries that are members of OPEC, Iran and Iraq are in a pretty awkward position to be selling us oil reliably. Libya and Nigeria have uprisings every now and then, but I’m sure the pipeline is still flowing. And Venezuela…well Bush just doesn’t like Chavez, but there’s no supply problem there.

So WHY THEN? Why did I just pay 50 bucks to fill up when 10 bucks was a respectable trip to the pump 10 years ago? There hadn’t been a major oil reserve discovery since the 1970s, but major reserves have just been discovered in Brazil and China recently, which just increases the supply even further. But given the increased demand and problems in Iraq and Iran, the price was bound to go up…but not this much.

Ok, so you want to know the real reason? The first reason is the dollar is weakening. The price of oil is measured in dollars all over the world and that dollar is steadily going down. So oil really doesn’t cost much more than it did last year, we just pay more for it because we use the dollar.

The second reason, the one that’s going to make you mad, is the oil companies haven’t built a refinery in this country since 1976. They argue that they cannot afford to build any new refineries considering the new stricter environmental regualtions from the EPA. This coming from the industry that pumped in a staggering $100 billion in profit last year.

The third reason, the one that’s gonna make you IRATE, is that the price of gas goes up because you will pay for it. Whenever the price of a raw good goes up, retailers have to pay more for it and they pass that increase off to the customer. The retailer in effect makes more money, but their profit margin doesn’t necessarily have to go up. As a matter of fact, they can afford for their profit margin to go down because of the increase in revenue (think Wal-Mart). But Big Oil decided their profit margin would go up from 7% 10 years ago to 14% today. And that’s just not fair.

So how do we force the price back down? Regulation. I know they tell you that regulation puts a stranglehold on the free market and hinders advancements in technology. But considering they haven’t made a new refinery in 30 years they don’t seem to want to advance technologically. We regulate electricity, natural gas and water, all of which are just as vital as gasoline to our economy and way of life.

But we all know it’s not going to happen. And actually it’s ok. True we’re hurting right now, but the increased price in gas is inspiring the discovery of renewable energy sources and technologies. And as long as we support the new industries that are trying to clean the planet up and demonize the oil industry who is basically just punking us at this point, the better off we will be in the long run.

Obama Locks It Up, Hillary’s Debt Grows

During his victory speech in Iowa last night, President Sen. Barack Obama claimed victory in the pledged delegate count:

“And tonight, in the fullness of spring, with the help of those who stood up from Portland to Louisville, we have returned to Iowa with a majority of delegates elected by the American people, and you have put us within reach of the Democratic nomination for President of the United States.”

The speech followed his 35 point loss in Kentucky and his 16 point win in Oregon. And he followed that with an endorsement by Connecticut Rep. Joe Courtney, increasing his lead in that category as well.

Hillary, on the other hand, following her meaningless victory in Kentucky is now $21 million in debt. So that means, despite the fact that she knows she cannot possibly win anything but maybe an amateur staring contest, she has to keep trying to raise money to pay off her bills. Too bad that Hatfield kid’s bike and video game loot got squandered. Doesn’t sound like she’s make a very fiscally responsible Commander in Chief to me.

Ted Kennedy Released from Hospital

We’re happy to hear that Sen. Ted Kennedy has been released from Massachusetts General Hospital this morning and is headed back to his home in Cape Cod. He waved to well wishers and greeted his 2 dogs as he exited the hospital without the aid of a wheelchair.

Sen. Kennedy was diagnosed earlier this week with malignant glioma, which in most cases is fatal. However, he seems to be in good spirits and people who know him say he is a fighter. The 76 year old Senator plans to spend the week sailing and with his family. We wish him well.

McCain Is Just Making Stuff Up Now

In a rally yesterday, Obama defended his stance on opening talks with America’s enemies, saying:

“Strong countries and strong Presidents talk to their adversaries. That’s what Kennedy did with Kruschev, that’s what Reagan did with Gorbachev, that’s what Nixon did with Mao. I mean think about it, Iran, Cuba, Venezuela, these countries are tiny compared to the Soviet Union.”

And here’s how Teflon John heard it:

“Senator Obama claimed that the threat Iran poses to our security is ‘tiny’ compared to the threat once posed by the former Soviet Union. Should Iran acquire nuclear weapons that danger would become very dire indeed. They might not become a super power, but the threat the government of Iran poses is anything but tiny.”

There’s a really good hearing aid joke here, but I’m gonna let it slide. It’s sad to me that when people know they can’t win in a fair debate that they resort to flat out lying to get their point across. Obama was very clearly speaking on the geographical and military size of the former Soviet Union, not its threat level. And if he was talking about that, he still would have been telling the truth. Maybe I haven’t been keeping my YouTube game up, but all of the videos of kids running to take shelter under their desks that I’ve seen are in black and white. So honestly, the threat is not as great. By McCain’s own admission, none of these TINY countries will ever become a super power. So…why are we dropping $2 billion a week on that whole endeavor again?

I’m hoping McCain didn’t really hear Obama’s speech and one of his lobbyists campaign managers just told him that lie.

How Hillary Could Have Become President

She should have run in 2004

Let’s be real, Hillary has been planning to run for President since Bill won in 1992, and probably before. She’s from Chicago, went to college in Massachusetts, law school in Connecticut, and lived her married years in Arkansas. So why the heck is she a Senator from New York? Short answer: because Wall Street is in New York. It’s also the 3rd most populous state in the country. All of that adds up to a big constituency and big campaign dollars. She easily won her Senate campaign in 2001 and was poised to run for President once she gained some experience in Congress.

And here’s where she made her mistake. She didn’t think that a Junior Senator with 3 years of experience as a legislator would make a viable candidate. And historically, she’s right, but Obama has proven the past not to be the best indicator of the future. So the Democrats went with Kerry after Dean’s outburst (which is still funny). Nobody really LIKED Kerry, they just disliked Bush…and he still only lost by 2 points. So had Hillary run in 2004, I’m sure these same issues of experience would arise toward her, but she still would have won. She would have locked up the youth vote, the Black vote, the Hispanic vote, the anti-war vote, and the women vote. Those hard working white people that she’s clinging to now would have still voted for Bush though. And she’d be President today, probably coasting to her 2nd term leaving Obama to run in 2012.

Shoulda, woulda, coulda.

Instead, now she’s at the mercy of a 46 year old newcomer who basically just destroyed her lifelong dream. Considering that, she’s taking it very well and you can’t blame her for fighting. Hopefully Obama will offer he some major post just short of VP so that she can save face for the time being. But her political career will never be the same. Even if she does get elected President in the future, it will be because Obama has served for 8 years and can’t run again. But with a little luck and a lot of Botox, she’ll make it…one day.

Hateration

Political has-been Geraldine Ferraro just released a statement that she will definitely not vote for Obama, saying:

“I think Obama was terribly sexist.”

She went on to say:

“We (women), the most loyal constituency, are being told to sit down, shut up and get to the back of the bus,”

Really? This is after she said earlier this year:

“If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position. And if he was a woman (of any color) he would not be in this position. He happens to be very lucky to be who he is. And the country is caught up in the concept.”

So let me get this right. It’s ok to vote for a woman because she’s a woman, but not ok to vote for a black man because he’s black? Here’s the thing, it’s not that she can’t be elected BECAUSE she’s a woman. And it’s not like Americans wouldn’t elect A woman, even Hillary one day (maybe). On the contrary, I think this primary cycle has shown that a woman definitely has a shot at the Presidency. It’s just that we really like the black guy. He seems genuine, like he listens to people, and all naivete aside he really at least wants to change things.

But hopefully she’ll just stay home. If you agree with McCain on the issues then you should definitely vote for him. But to vote for one guy solely because the other guy called you out publicly is just silly, disloyal, and ungenuine. Stop hating.

McCain Hates Highways

Ok, so the self-deprecating thing is a good defense mechanism for staving off criticism. And on principle, McCain is right when he says that there needs to be more oversight of “pork barrel” earmarks that find there way into Congressional bills. McCain, toting his opposition to earmarks on this past weekend’s Saturday Night Live, jokingly said:

“When I entered the Senate in 1987, Arizona had 47,000 miles of paved roadway. Today it’s less than 900.”

Yeah, that’s not funny. The reason there are earmarks is largely because Congress takes a long time to pass legislation, so they combine initiatives to pass multiple things at once. Opponents of earmarks usually note that overspending and funding projects that do little to benefit the common good are bad investments of federal funds (e.g. the Bridge to Nowhere bill that never even saw the light of day). But to say that there should be NO earmarks is irresponsible. I think we all remember the bridge collapse in Minnesota last year which woke us up to the fact that our 50 year old highway system is in need of maintenance. And to joke about allowing our interstates to crumble just isn’t funny.

The jokes about his age, however, were pretty hilarious.